God, Glue-Guns, and Glory

This curated-and-updated post was originally published Oct. 29, 2009, and centers around a situation in which Home Depot terminated an employee named Trevor Keezer for refusing to remove a pin from his work uniform, while working, that read “One Nation, Under God, INDIVISIBLE.” You may recognize this as one of the many Islamophobic slogans that was flying around during the decade or so after 9-11 (and to some extent still are). The company’s policy was that employees may not wear anything on their uniform that wasn’t provided by the company. While a great deal of noise was made in right-wing media over the whole thing and indeed a lawsuit was filed, there’s no indication it ever went to court, and indeed it seems to have just been quietly dropped after a year of right-wing media outlets trying to drum out outrage over the “discrimination” against Christianity.

This essay is presented as originally written in the immediate aftermath of the event, with minor editorial corrections and edits. -jh

I’m definitely missing my camcorder today as this pointless, divisive kerfluffle over some redneck getting fired for pushing his religion on people on the workplace.  What a great topic for a video rant…

I find it hilarious that so many people get all het up and whiny about BOYCOTT HOME DEPOT THOSE ATHEIST EVUL COMMIES, but boy wouldn’t they feel differently if the guy expressing his religious views on his work uniform was a Muslim, druid, or follower of Cthulhu?  But no, it’s shove those noses in the air, start wringing your hands, and quick everybody get wrapped up in a my-god-is-better-than-your-god argument that solves nothing and distracts us from dealing with the very REAL and PRESENT and OBSERVABLE problems that we are wrapped up in.

A friend on Facebook linked to the Today show’s little fan page there, where one such conversation is taking place.  it’s hilarious.  “It’s not freedom FROM religion it’s freedom OF religion!”  Uh…same thing, Captain Logic  Freedom of religion by necessity includes the freedom to not participate in any religion at all without fear of persecution or discrimination.  And then it’s the same tired old arguments that have been shot down time and time and time again over how this is a ‘Christian nation’ (it isn’t and it never was) or how anyone who doesn’t believe in Jethro Bodine’s particular concept of “God” is unpatriotic and evil and should LUV IT ER LEEV IT.

Now there’s a proud American sentiment, eh?  You must worship according to our rules or be rejected from society.  Oh, hey, waitaminnit, that’s the whole reason we (well, YOU.  My people are native american, dutch, and black) left England in the first place, isn’t it?

What I can’t figure out is where all of these ‘good Christians’ get the fancy bibles that are missing the first part of Matthew 6.  Especially verse five:

And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward.

This is one of the most important verses in the Christian canon, and one of the most overlooked.  In short, it says “you keep your religion between you and your god, rather than displaying it openly so that you can make money or impress people with your piety.  ‘God’ does not care if your friends are impressed with how holy you are, so STFU and keep it to yourself.  Anything else is stagecraft and hypocrisy.  I AM, that which I AM, and I do not need to pursue or convince my creatures of my power, nor need I for you to pursue or convince them on My behalf; they will choose to come to me.”

I’ve seen this behavior at many large companies I’ve been employed by over the years, people decorating their cubes with their little holier-than-thou displays of bible verse and self-aggrandizing piety.  It made me terribly uncomfortable, afraid to express myself openly.  I even had colleagues ask me what church I attended – love that assumption that I attend ANY church, let alone that it’s anyone else’s damn business which one.

(Sidebar:  One of the precious, self-righteous jerks I observed made the remark that one of HD’s competitors offers a standard military discount, so they were a better store anyway.  My first thought:  WTF lady you sent your husband off to die so you could get a good price on f’n gutters?!  How callous.)

I don’t have anything against believers, personally.  I just don’t believe that your beliefs give you the right to force those beliefs on anyone else, particularly when you’re in a public-facing customer service role; it’s obnoxious, unwelcoming, and exclusionary to anyone who doesn’t share your beliefs – which, frankly, is the entire point of doing it so let’s not kid ourselves. 

You want to blog about Jesus and pray in your facebook status, that’s no skin off my nose in the least. I don’t want to be prayed over at Home Depot or have my soul saved at McDonalds or get into a long discussion about my religious beliefs when I try to buy a slurpee.

I still can find no Christian principle is supported by wearing buttons and slogans on my clothing to push my views on other people when I’m at work.  That guy wasn’t being paid to proselytize, he was being paid to stock shelves or run a cash register.  When I’ve had corporate jobs I haven’t decorated my workspace with political or social or religious messages.  Of course I have opinions, that much should be no secret by now, but I also have enough grace and respect for others to not make their work day uncomfortable by broadcasting them in that forum.  That’s not where they belong. 

Believe what you want.  I won’t hold it against you, in and of itself. Do I have things to say about these issues?  Of course…but not when I’m working for someone else.  If I’m stocking shelves or building databases or whatever, I’m being paid to do that, and all of my time save that which is necessary to attend to the necessities of human body function – i.e. eating, drinking, restroom, and a short step-away every few hours to ‘cleanse the palate’ and clear the head for more effective work function – should be spent doing that.

But more than anything else, what really chaps my ass about this whole thing is the smug tyranny of the majority, that obnoxious and distinctly un-Christian attitude that so many self-proclaimed followers of Jesus display to the rest of the world.  You know, that condescending crap they wrap around themselves that screams to the world, “I am a member of a special club, and if you don’t do things my way you can’t join my special club, and then I and all of my special friends will make fun of you and not rent apartments to you and not let you eat at our restaurants or date our daughters or work for us, because YOU are not one of US, and there’s not a damn thing you can do about it because GAWD is on MY SIDE.”

This root and its derivatives are, and have always been, among the fundamental causes of human misery.

Isn’t it ironic that so many followers of the “Prince of Peace” will cheerfully do violence and wage war in his name?  Isn’t it ironic, that so many followers of the man who said “Be ye kind one unto another, tenderhearted, forgiving…” (Ephesians 4:32) are so cruel and heartless in their dealings with one another.  That the religion which gave us the concept of pride as sin should give rise to such pride-filled followers; that the religion which purports to teach us that judgment lies solely in the hands of the Almighty should generate so many adherents who incessantly judge others on their mode of worship, their sexual habits, or whatever else, rarely if ever exercising such strict judgment on themselves.

Every one of us – every one of us – has skeletons in our closet.  We are all human, we are all fallible, and we are all in this together.  Anything that separates us one from another in the greater sense, as religion unquestionably does, is by definition genocidal…if slowly.

The guy shouldn’t have had the pin on his uniform.  When the whole story’s out, it’s likely that he was asked/told/warned about this several times, and further that his decision to start publicly practicing his religion at work was intended to get him fired and provoke just this kind of self-righteous indignance, once again warming the fires that keep us from coming together as one people to solve our common problems, face our common threats, and improve our common state of being. [Ed. note 2023 – the eventual playing out of this case in one brief announcement of a lawsuit a year later followed by dead silence from all sides bears this analysis out entirely. He was in fact asked, told, warned, and even offered a company approved pin reading “United We Stand,” which is the same sentiment minute the Islamophobia/Christian proseltyzing. -jh]

tl;dr:  deer xtians more cheekturning plz